Pirates are Cool.

Captured bits of life... Pirates at no extra cost. Arrrg. Also cool: Zombies, Aliens, Ninjas, Dinosaurs, Vikings, the Noble River Horse, the Sinister Octopi, Robots and Kittens.

Wednesday, November 29, 2006


I derived great pleasure from wearing a star wars episode I t-shirt all of yesterday... hidden beneath my hoodie... where none could see it...

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Fucking essay.

I'm writing a paper for Contemporary American Fiction. On the third page alone, I've quoted the word "fuck" three times. Intense.

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

The problem with creative writing

I have a problem. First off, I don't write as often as I'd like to. Especially over the last two years. But, finding the time can be difficult, and university is not always condusive to the mindset needed to pump out a good story. But that's a minor issue. The real problem is what education is doing to my ideas. I cringe and writhe when I think of some of the trite passages that have flowed forth from my finger (hey, that was some good alliteration). But, for all the tens of unfinished stories with a fun narrative but no backbone, there are a few gems i managed to polish off. One in particular stands out, the work that still carries its working titles (because nothing presented itself otherwise) - "Oh Shit." This title, obviously, needs to go. and I've mulled it over in days long past, but have been ultimately unable to change it. However, recent events (Mainly, being handed a free copy of GIDEONS BIBLE) have reminded me of an intended edit to the story. Upon applying certain concepts I have learned about literature in the past three years, I realised how I could make this story into something more than it ever was.

Allow me to use my blog to write down a few notes to myself (so as to make sure I won't forget).
-Names will change. A lot of them. Josh becomes Dan, Cathy becomes Nancy, Jethro becomes Isaac, Zephyr has to change to something else.
-An additional vehicle must be used. It will affectionately be refered to as "The Gideon." It belongs to Peter.
-trite sentences will be removed.
-The sick (absent) teacher will be named "Robert Service (no relation to the poet)"
-"The small town" will be named (douglas coupland, eat your heart out. Canadian lit stays put)
all of these will have bearing on the narrative. It's likely many passages will change. And additional scene will be added to the beginning of the story. Possibly two. This will deal with the larger issue of the major change in focus that occured when I was writing the original (away from romance to the greater plot of the prank).


Seems I've got my work cut out for me.

Tuesday, November 21, 2006


My house currently smells exactly like the day care I went to when I was three. I don't know why. It certainly makes me feel like I don't want chicken noodle soup, and that maybe a crispy peanut butter snack would be real tasty. Perhaps Zach Telford would be up for a game of kerplunk? And the lego is lame - they dodn't even have any pirates.
Amasing how a smell can so clearly define events from seventten or eighteen years ago.

Monday, November 20, 2006

sailboat race

I had a dream last night that Corey and Trevor of Trailer Park Boys were in a sailboat, racing Mr. Lahey who was in an aluminum boat with an outboard motor down a river. I mean, honestly, what the hell? Who has a dream like that? I think I might fire my subconscious mind.

Thursday, November 16, 2006

Tell me whats wrong with these words

Breakfast Doritos

Thursday, November 09, 2006

What a lucky baby.

Today in class, Professor Brown was real excited because today was the day his daughter had her first child. And man, that little girl is one lucky baby - she gets the absent minded professor himself as a grandfather. How cool is that?

Also, I love how the first years eemingly never do laundry. Its like, whenever I want, there are four laundry machines just waiting for me! Of course, I hate it when the spin cycle doesn't work in one of them.

Friday, November 03, 2006

Can't - no... sorry... Feudal System.

From now on in, when I need an excuse for something, that excuse is going to be the feudal system. Becauce I am part of the feudela system, y'see. I am a serf, and i am employed as such at Medieval Times.

I mean honestly? Who works at medieval times?

Feudal System.

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Wow. Man.

its been a really long time since i posted a commenton blogger while i was drunk. I actually don't have anything of consequence to say, i just thought i should observe that fact.